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My beard does not look like poop

A bunch of us were hanging out tonight, and Ian showed everyone the results of his efforts in his “Abs class”.  I said I could beat him, because I’m subconsiously in constant compitition with Ian apparently, and he called me out.  So I got to show everyone my abs, as well.  Pretty exibitionist.  Lauren shielded her eyes from the display.  This is typical Lauren behavior.  I only mention it because we were swimming together yesterday, so the irrationality is especially apparent.